Cracking a Smile

 

Cracking a Smile

 

And she says to me:

‘crack a smile –‘

you’re thinking

I’d rather crack an egg –

or did not the clown say to Wagner:

‘Why, if I pulverize the calcareous,

do I not scoop out the meat,

to give you half?’

It seems not – rather

there’s raw shoulders of mutton

enough to satisfy the famished glutton

and the world as the yolk

enclosed within the white –

where’s Kit Marlowe? Search him up

send forth the hounds

bring us the sounds

of fang clenched britches,

send for the witches,

if we pull this off, there will be riches.

 

Stand down Margaret –

you want outstanding?

I invoke Cameron’s coasting coastal schools –

all his fools

and how they did for us –

here’s much the same

void of Latin declensions,

brimming with tension,

presenting pretension,

failed teachers four

who sidle in through the out door

and bare their teeth in fawning grins,

well you’re fooling no one.

‘I nominate thee

to work with me and not against,

stand forth Demetrius,

take what’s yours and be damned!

Stand forth Lysander,

thou, thou hath bewitched bosoms

with nought but trifles,

spreadsheets, ticksheets,

sheets of foolscap, mostly mislaid

and for this

a heavy price must be paid.

 

Here’s me feigning to grin –

wibble wobble, wibble wobble,

jelly on a plate

let’s have 10 days Inspection straight,

what heinous sins

that belong to me,

might they, this day uncover?

But she says to me

as we sit, side by side,

welled up, emotional:

‘Will you rid me of this turbulent priest?’

And as I take up this perilous emprise,

fulfill her solemn binding behest -

for only she binds me to her breast -

this one I hold most dearly,

whom I love the best

and would not see her downcast –

‘No, no!’ Speaks she like child,

‘For God’s sake, Peter, crack a smile.’