Net Zero

 

Net Zero

 

Net Zero, Cancel Culture, Operation Greenfly,

no petrol engined cars in 2035 -

Bernard Manning’s toast and marmalade

is in those little racked triangle displays -

if you’re a Bay City Roller, be very afraid

and surely Reggie Perrin once blacked up,

Rigsby’s magic love wood sticks, interrupted

with lustful cries of Miss Jones, Miss Jones.

Oy, yoi, yoi, you with ologies, scrolling iPhones

while overseas, not too far from here,

the stage is set and we’ll impose our ideals yet,

close your strait and mine your ocean

because I’ve got a notion, suntan lotion

has your actual emulsion base, part oil

so spread it on your hot peeled skin, baby,

and while you’re boiling, we’ll send the navy.

Oh, the wailing and gnashing of teeth

from within the Great Barrier Reef

and beyond – Westward, Calendar, Look East,

they said wind turbines would bring relief,

geothermal and hydroelectric is where it’s at

photovoltaic solar farms and other crap,

see what brave new worlds have brought you,

your tankers hove-to, dead in the water,

they're lying becalmed, but where’s the harm?